Thursday, September 07, 2006

A Rest from the Rantings

So are y'all reading and just not commenting? I feel like maybe everyone got used to me not posting very often and checked out for good. But after my grumpy rant (the one from yesterday- to be clear, there have been so many!), I actually slept for most of the night last night! It was nothing short of miraculous and I sort of thought to myself upon awaking fairly rested, "I sure am glad I mentioned my troubles; people must've been praying for me." Not to be hoodoo voodoo about prayer, but there is something to it. I started taking a class at the seminary last fall about prayer because it is such an odd thing. I am definitely not someone who scores real high in that area on "spiritual gift inventory" type things. I have a hard time suspending reality and this makes much of the more relational parts of my life difficult. I won't mention every area, but for example, it makes play pretend with my children really hard for me or enjoying a night out when there is a lot of housework at home to do near impossible in much the same way it makes talking to an unseeable God really strange for me. I just don't easily shove aside the reality of not being a dinosaur or not being a carefree college student anymore ('cause dating was a sinch when all I had was time!) or not seeing anyone as I am talking. I only went to the class once because it was three hours long, right at suppertime all the way up until almost bedtime which made for a very hungry and sleepy me. It was a lot of time too to be away from home, where I felt like I should be giving the family a meal and getting the kids a bath etc. If I had it to do again, I may have stayed in. Part of it too was the whole registration process. I had to become a student which involved an application and referrals and a bunch of other stuff I didn't want to deal with. So like me. Anyway, Jerram Barrs, who many of you are familiar with, was the professor teaching the class. I really liked his approach just for the three hours I heard him. He seems to be such a dear and tenderhearted person. I recently came across my notes and skimmed through them. There were a lot of questions he raised about prayer that it would be good to look into the answers to. It's too bad I didn't hear the lectures offering some answers. And so this is sort of a deadend post because I don't have much to offer on the topic. Just thought I'd share an answer to my prayers recently and thank anyone who might've felt the urge to lift my troubles up as well. I can't tell you how much less depressing the morning is when you haven't been up alone watching the clock all night. I think that is a big part of it. Sure I am tired and need the rest. Mostly though, I just hate how lonely the hours are during the night when the whole rest of the world is sleeping. That's why middle of the night nursing isn't so bad, the baby is up with you! Anyway, I am very thankful for the rest and thankful for the boost in faith I get when I feel like our Great God cares if random Abby Edema gets some sleep.

2 comments:

RHB said...

I have a recommendation for you since you never made it to your class on prayer. :)A Dutch Reformed South African guy, Andrew Murray wrote a really great book on prayer called Ministry of Intercession. Kind of world rocking to me, but very good. Also EM Bounds has written some great stuff. Both are old guys so their books are always on the sale racks at the Christian bookstores.

RHB said...

Glad you got some sleep! Can't wait to find out that my new neice or nephew is finally here!

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