Saturday, July 05, 2008

But We're Cheery

Sorry to leave you with my bad attitude for so long. It's a tricky thing, a bad attitude. There is the part of me who says, "I have a bad attitude and that is how it is and that is just going to have to be okay." Then there is the part of me who says, "I should have a good attitude. I really need to do better and be better and get a grip." And then, the person you usually encounter is the person who is entirely too ADD to focus on any one attitude in particular and is just bouncing from one task to another, one mood to another, willy nilly, and you just never know what you will get. So, if you have talked to me lately, you could have gotten any one of these parts of me. And maybe you thought I was overly cranky. Or worse, maybe you thought I was being really fake and not at all vulnerable and honest like I claim to be. Or, maybe you thought, "Wow, she is really a spaz. And who in the world spends two hours scrubbing off outdoor toys with soap and water before packing them?" (Oh, me, that's who.) But, as my friend Ami would say, "Abby, you're fine." She is very fond of saying so. Because I am always having conversations with her that go something like this paragraph. And I think what she means is that I don't have to apologize for myself. So I won't.

Except, it's like an itch that has to be scratched. I just so hate when I freak out. I have a long standing blogging policy that is, "don't blog angry." And it has done me alright for a while. But, and my apologies to male readers, I think there might should be an ammendment to the policy that is, "don't blog menstrual." Really, so many things besides blogging should get that ammendment. Wouldn't that be nice? Don't cook. Or do laundry. Or get out of bed.... but I digress. Anyhoo, I still have to move to my parents' house. And I still have a whole lot o' packing to do. And it still is no fun. But, I am handling it alright. One day at a time and all of that. I really think that running helps. Have I already said this? Forget physical health, a good long run is so great for my mental health. Er, you know what I mean. It just keeps me from being a basket case. Which is strange when you figure I probably ran 40 miles a week in high school and I was a total basket case. What would I have been like if I hadn't been a runner?! Oh dear! Let's not even think about that!

So, I still don't have too much to say, unless you want to hear all the minutiae of my packing and cleaning. I just thought I'd put a cheerier post up. (Not that this is so very cheery, but it wasn't hard to get cheerier than the last one. Nowhere to go but up!) I appreciate so so so very much the comments and emails and phone calls in response to my last post. Thanks for all the encouragement. Keep it coming; I am soaking it up!

1 comment:

Wrights said...

We've been praying for the move to your parents' house. When do you come? We are going to the beach this week but I'd love to have y'all over to play after that if you will be around. We're still praying for a job too. And I agree with your friend that you ARE fine and totally don't need to apologize for yourself. Your friends love you for you.

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